awesomephilia: parental—radvisory: awesomephilia: How to Mean Girls your dog [via] crying
doodoomar: lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake
metallickah: unrealthings: batreaux: this is my linen closet, *shows you some towels* and this is my lenin closet *shows you communist propaganda* #Bed Bath and Bolsheviks #communism works on paper but not on tile or marble
mandatoryupgrades: Anyone who thinks Shakespeare is boring apparently missed the greatest stage direction ever written: I want that to be the final line of my biography.
awesomephilia: shalrath: what we should be getting a multiple tag search option an actually working block option a fix on the tumblr video player being able to post pictures into the caption of anything else besides a text post what we are getting my thoughts exactly
norsegays: “tumblr should have its own island!!!!!!!!”
Spock and Kirk's relationship in a nutshell
Spock: don't do the thing
Kirk: I'M GOING TO DO THE THING
googlehomie: ahh school… *inhales deeply* the sweet smell of a flawed education system and high stress levels
diverged: I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months
swagtag (n) - the metallic stickers that guys never remove from their fitted hats; invented by the government to mark and identify douchebags in the wild.
Other children's books: I dunno if we should even mention death explicitly
Choose Your Own Adventure books: The main character dies because they get swarmed by red ants while asleep also the main character is you
thedogekeepstry1ng: girls (⌒▽⌒)☆ girls!! (◕‿◕✿) girls s (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ girls ??? ヾ(´･ ･｀｡)ノ” GIRLs (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ g̯̀i͉̻͐̓͗ͦR̬͙̼̮͆̔̓ͦ̒L͈̺̂̊͑̈́̎̄S͐̏̋̎̂ ヽ(ﾟДﾟ)ﾉ
anusking: hot things to say during sex: Abraham Lincoln meme harder mitochondria let’s watch icarly why didn’t you reblog that post I made WARMACHINEROX
jawnn-locked: adiostoreadontcare: turntechtier: jawnn-locked: turntechtier: jawnn-locked: the okay gatsby the mediocre gatsby the you could have done better gatsby the terrible gatsby The -you did great but not oscar award winning great- gatsby
plot twist: 5 years later she never sees sk8er boi on MTV because MTV doesn't play music.
grimybear: the best thing about taking exams in college is that once you’re done you can leave right away to go cry
If they ever change the CTRL+S command, I’m gonna be so boned because I use that shit like second nature for everything I do.
anniephantom: labirdgeoiseed: this is my favorite goofy pun ever, I have told it at least five times I don’t care, fuck you okay ready as you all know, saint patrick walked barefoot as an act of contrition, which made his feet rugged and blistered. he ate an ascetic’s diet, which made him weak and additionally gave him bad breath. all of this made him a super-calloused fragile mystic...
wearesorryfortheinconvenience: moffats-army: wearesorryfortheinconvenience: today i said to my friend “i haven’t had a go-gurt in a really long time” AND HE LOOKED REALLY LOST?? AND I EXPLAINED TO HIM WHAT A GO-GURT WAS AND HE SAID “OH IN CANADA WE CALL THOSE TUBES” TUBE S BUT ITS YOGURT ON THE GO CANADA IM SO S ICK OF UR SHIT #sorry if we dont want our yogurt sounding like a std ah,...
brandnewswastikas: I’m sorry for calling your salad a bunch of “gay-ass leaves.”
So, my friend is stage managing Macbeth and made...
fuckingmultiverse: letsgivethesekidsashow: honeychildplease: I’m quite pleased with this. Rapping this out loud in my empty classroom like swag. WALK INTO THE CLUB LIKE WADDUP I AM A BIG SCOT I’M SO PUMPED ABOUT SOME VISION THAT THE WITCHES GOT I WILL BE THANE, SO SAYS THE PROPHECY THAT PEOPLE LIKE “DAMN, MACBETH DESERVES GLORY”